India is a country of unity in diversity,multilingual people,different religions,and age old customs,which make it unique in itself. While some of the customs and traditions are good ,many of them aren’t so. And the one in particular I want to highlight here today is dowry.Whilst things are changing I thought, dowry has become almost extinct, until I saw it happen to someone very close to me.
One of my best friends is getting married and the guy’s family has asked for 5 lakhs cash in dowry along with the fact that they won’t bear any wedding expense and they demanded the money in context of wedding arrangements! I mean duh! And yeah,on top of the 5 lakhs the guy’s parents expect the girl’s family to provide them of all the basic household things like tv,fridge,bed,almirah etc.Just a few days before they got engaged and it’s all over facebook,but looking at the guy all I could think was ‘what a lowly guy! what has he done to have the beautiful lady, 5 lakhs cash and no wedding expense. Just that he’s born with a dick? Yeah,born with a dick but no balls.ha!’
To no surprise, it so happened that the engagement rings for both guy and girl was bought by the girl’s parents. I mean the guy can’t even afford to buy her the ring of promise? When I questioned the girl regarding this, she was all over me,furious. To quote her exact words,’You are a person with negative thinking, they are poor and so they can’t afford the wedding,5 lakhs is not a big deal! One of my friend’s parents paid 30 lakhs in dowry as she got married to an IAS. This is a reasonable amount.’
I was of course shell shocked and hurt both at the same time. First of all her friend’s parents paying 30 lakhs dowry to IAS or whatever bullshit job the guy had was wrong in itself. So you cannot compare one wrong to another, it doesn’t makes the wrong right. And a guy who could afford flight tickets,fancy dress for engagement,earning a decent salary can’t afford you a ring? How would you live with him your whole life, what’s the guarantee he will support you for life? You want your parents to keep supporting him financially,once the 5 lakhs run out? And would the guy marry you if your parent’s cannot afford all of these demands? Are you sure about that?And how can one say 5 lakhs is not a big deal? Earn that 5 lakhs for yourself and you will realize how hard earned money it is by your father.I was hurt because I thought of her to be a strong willed and rational person. But alas that wasn’t the whole truth perhaps.
But at the end I wish for her to be happy. I wish that she has a very happy married life and that guy turns out as she is expecting him to be.